How To Deal With Tempting Shortcuts and Challenges To Your Professional Identity
Have you ever found yourself tested to stay true to yourself? That could be in life, in a relationship, with your kids, and, of course, with your employer (even if you're self-employed)?
When you're faced with these tests, what do you do? Do you compromise yourself? Let go of your desires? Minimize and hide different sides of yourself to blend in better?
How does that feel? (Usually pretty icky)
How often are you feeling this way?
Remember, professional identity is how you see yourself in your work and in your career. It's what you call yourself beyond the job title(s) you've been given. Only you know your professional identity and only you can define it for others.
Yet, we live in a society where we're constantly being challenged to prove who we are and to measure up to some ideal.
A challenge to your professional identity is when your professional identity comes into question, you might feel undermined, disrespected or misunderstood. You feel someone doesn't get you, or you don't get yourself.
Things that challenge your professional identity are:
A new job
A job title that inflates, diminishes or neutralizes your value
An employer or manager
Colleagues (new or existing)
Lay offs or being fired
A poor performance review
Family and friends
Your own self-perception
Comparison syndrome
Pop culture and influencers
Books, literature, media and stories about other's careers
Traditional career coaches
Academic pathways or workforce pathways
The economy
Desperation
I'm sure you can think of others to include on this list.
Essentially, your professional identity is challenged on a daily basis. Until you have a clear sense of who you are, what you stand for, and why you are who you say you are, the universe is going to keep sending you tests to make you confirm you really know yourself. And if you don't know yourself, then you'll keep being confused and change your mind until you do.
Every external force in our lives is capable of instilling doubt, disbelief and delusion about who we think we are.
The challenge is this: to maintain a clear and steadfast sense of your professional identity no matter what comes your way, no matter what other people tell you they think you are, no matter what jobs you do (or don't do). Hold true to you.
TEMPTING SHORTCUTS TO YOUR IDENTITY
A shortcut is a temporary fix but never a full solution.
There are lots of ways to overcome the circumstances and voices (especially the ones in your head) that challenge your professional identity and make you feel "less than your true self". Usually, you want a quick fix and get seduced to try those first.
Tempting shortcuts pull us in with headlines like:
"Join this course and have a new life in 30 days"
"Earn this certification and make six figures a month"
"Take this pill and feel better"
I know I've been sucked into such remedies when times have been tough and I lost my sense of myself. I've paid lots of money for treatments and coaches and answers. Some were good and some weren't. One thing I know for sure is this:
Shortcuts fall into categories
Numbing
Avoidance
Denial
Blame
We usually "take" a shortcut because we don't want to feel what we're actually feeling (numbing), we want to run away from whatever is happening (avoidance), we don't want to believe the actual truth (denial), or we think it's someone's fault or we're at fault and we're mad at ourselves (blame).
I can't tell you not to take a shortcut because we all do. It's our nature.
What I hope is that you'll pay attention to: a) when you're professional identity is being challenge. If so, by whom and why?; and b) notice if you're being tempted by a shortcut, and if so, why?
The Lesson
From all my research on identity and professional identity, figuring out ourselves is hard work, it doesn't happen overnight, it requires patience, a lot of self-reflection, growth in our self-confidence, and it is more successfully discovered if we have a capable guide to reflect our self back to ourselves.
If you are looking for a shortcut, there is no quick fix. There never will be because knowing our professional identity is an intimate and dynamic process of self-examination.
Instead of shortcuts, lean into accepting the hard work and effort of getting to really know yourself. Enjoy examining yourself layer by layer. It is worth it. Once you know yourself, your professional identity can never be challenged again except by you.